| You know the situation: There you are at
| |
| | is a great reputation to have!That is
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| a business or social function and you end
| |
| | another key here. You can't be a selfish,
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| up with someone who you have never met
| |
| | arrogant person and be successful. I am
|
| before. Some people get amazingly
| |
| | talking true well-rounded success, not
|
| uncomfortable with this situation because
| |
| | just collecting a pot full of money.The
|
| they simply don't know how to start or
| |
| | best way to describe this process is to
|
| carry on a conversation. Yet successful
| |
| | write out a mock conversation. You will
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| people are always going to find
| |
| | notice the kinds of questions I would
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| themselves in these kinds of situations
| |
| | ask, when I find a connection, and how I
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| because they are always stretching
| |
| | would go in that direction."Hi, I'm Chris
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| themselves and putting themselves into
| |
| | Widener. What is your name?""Joe
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| situations to help them and their
| |
| | Schmoe.""Well, Joe, what do you do for a
|
| businesses grow and that means meeting
| |
| | living?""I sell insurance." (Possible
|
| new people. So if you are going to be
| |
| | connection here. Everybody has
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| successful, one thing you have to get
| |
| | insurance)"Oh yeah? What kind of
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| down is how to talk to anybody, anytime.
| |
| | insurance?""I insure Oil rigs in the
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| Good news: It is easier than you
| |
| | Adriatic Sea." (Whoops. Lost
|
| think!First, a couple of things not to
| |
| | connection)"Wow. That's must be
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| do. One, don't get flustered and excuse
| |
| | fascinating. Married or kids, Joe?" (I
|
| yourself. That is the easy way out, and
| |
| | have a wife and kids, maybe we can show
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| you never know if you didn't just leave
| |
| | pictures)"No, actually, I'm single." (It
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| who would have become your best friend or
| |
| | isn't looking good yet)"So, who do you
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| closest business associate. Stick around!
| |
| | know here at the party?""Well, nobody. I
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| Secondly, don't start talking about
| |
| | am the brother of the host's accountant.
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| yourself. Sure, introduce yourself, but
| |
| | I'm in town for a week and my brother had
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| don't launch into a half-hour monologue
| |
| | to make an appearance." (It is going in
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| about your accomplishments. The other
| |
| | the wrong direction here)"So where are
|
| person will either roll their eyes back
| |
| | you from?""Nebraska." (Bingo, there it
|
| into their head or simply give you a new
| |
| | is. The connection! Now let's go in that
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| nickname: Joe "let me tell you a story
| |
| | direction)"Really? My dad was from
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| about myself" Schmoe. This leads me to
| |
| | Nebraska. Even though he died when I was
|
| the key.Talk about the person you have
| |
| | four, my grandmother used to take me back
|
| just met. Don't talk about yourself -
| |
| | to visit my relatives every summer
|
| talk about them! And the key is to ask
| |
| | growing up. It sure was a lot of fun.
|
| questions. Now, there are obviously some
| |
| | Were you city folk, or did you live on a
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| people you just will not be able to talk
| |
| | farm?""I grew up on a pig farm.""That's
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| to because they are absolute bores or
| |
| | what my relatives did! As a kid I always
|
| they are angry or upset or something, but
| |
| | wanted to ride one of those sows. Luckily
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| I have found that that is only about 1%
| |
| | my uncles never let me attempt it."There
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| of the people, if even that. For the most
| |
| | you are. Now just start asking questions
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| part, if you persist in asking questions,
| |
| | about what they did growing up, how they
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| you will be able to talk to anybody,
| |
| | liked it etc.If you get adept enough at
|
| anytime.There are three segments to this
| |
| | asking questions of others, you will
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| process:Ask questions.Find connections.Go
| |
| | inevitably find a connection to talk
|
| in those directions.What you are trying
| |
| | about. And having something in common
|
| to do is to find common ground. What
| |
| | with someone is the start to a long and
|
| makes people afraid to talk to others is
| |
| | mutually beneficial relationship - one of
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| that they are afraid they won't have
| |
| | the foundations of success!I am in a
|
| anything in common. I have found that
| |
| | career where I meet new people all the
|
| usually, if you ask questions for a
| |
| | time and this is exactly what I do. I am
|
| minute or two, you can always find a
| |
| | no better conversationalist than most of
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| connection with someone, and then you're
| |
| | you. It is just a proven way of getting a
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| set. The worst that could happen is that
| |
| | relationship off the ground with someone
|
| you ask the person questions for a few
| |
| | you have just met.Here it is again:Ask
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| minutes and find nothing. But what will
| |
| | questions, find connections, go in those
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| that person tell others? That you seem to
| |
| | directions.
|
| have a genuine interest in others. That
| |
| |
|